We often say here that the mission is like one long roller coaster - it's full of highs (really high) and lows (really low). This week in and of itself was a roller coaster, as mom kinda anticipated. Hit some highs, and took a pretty sharp plunge around Tues-Thursday, but recovered. I was really pretty down in the dumps around the hump, but I can't quite determine why exactly - what counts is that we climbed out together and are back on the horses.
Monday night, we out of the blue ended up taking Fab. and Flo. to a members house to teach them! It was kinda a tender mercy moment as we didn't plan it or anything, and everything turned out great. The Aldape fam fell in love with Perla, their 7 month old baby, and they also provided great testimony.
Tuesday, we had a Zone Meeting - long story short I tend to get irritated with these meetings. The ZLs do their job really well, which is iron out problems and help us set and reach goals, but it always ends up feeling like a pre-game locker room speech with them raising their voices and calling people out. They tend to deflate my confidence rather then build it up - I'm working on loving and trusting and following the leaders. Their intentions are all there but I feel like the spirit of trying to serve like Christ and become like Him kinda gets lost under the goals and quotas for baptisms. Kinda makes me scared if they call me as some sort of leader (and also bothers me that since the MTC people around me have been telling me I'll be AP some day). Just trying to stay humble and love the people, one day at a time.
Anyways, riding some pressure, Wed and Thursday failed miserably. All they talked about was finding new investigators, and Mon-Thursday we had 0. Standard for the week is 10. I kinda just spiraled down and had to work hard on keeping the faith. It felt like within a matter of 3 days I went from being on top of the world to in the bottom of a well. Still not really sure why - I think a lot of factors, and a lot of negative thinking.
I think the biggest would be a principle in these verses in D&C 58:
Wed, our comp study just wasn't that focused or worthwhile - a lot of distractions etc. I felt like such lack of focus, diligence, and obedience just killed us. Started the day off showing the Lord it didn't matter as much, and he thus tried our patience and faith. If ye are prepared, ye shall not fear. We weren't prepared...
Well, I repented, and was very grateful for the Sacrament yesterday.
Friday we got up and decided to change our circumstances, and the weekend was really good (despite the fact I lost my voice).
Speaking (hahahahah) of losing my voice... turned out to be a huge blessing in disguise for our companionship. Elder Mino dominated this week - he's been a little scared that he doesn't know enough to be teaching and controlling lessons, but he was forced to this week... and he killed it. He's riding 3 weeks, but is already way farther ahead than I was with 3 weeks. I love this kid, he's a boss. We really bonded as a team this week, especially with him stroking his confidence and me on the sidelines a bit. Great all around.
What's more, there's nothing like having a brother at your side when everything falls through and everyone rejects us. Thursday, we were just knocking on doors, and there was one contact in which we persisted and persisted, but nothing. The 3rd intent, Mino came in with his testimony, and as I watched him, I was filled with love for him and the blessed woman rejecting us, and the Lord, and this work. A moment of peace in a day of chaos.
Friday morning had one of the best lessons of the mission. We were teaching Hy., Ma., and Lu. - our family of 4 plus more. They have problems not limited to their family - the kids are always fighting. Friday, Hy. told us the problem isn't improving, even though they read the LdM and pray together. We were able to tie in this problem with principles of the Plan of Salvation, obedience, and baptisms for the dead. We both felt very guided by the Spirit as we taught these principles that we had planned. We reached a point in which I just bore my testimony and shared my love for them. It was powerful. I freakin love this family, and through some tears I told them. Left feeling very edified and inspired.
We had a miraculous coule of church attendances. The work is picking up, despite my stupidness.
Looking forward to teaching and loving and serving this week
Love you all,
|Me and L. - CAPO. Gonna be baptized Sat!|