First off, super pumped for my boy 52. Atta pep. Gonna be dope to hit Provo with you in a couple years.
The
theme for my letter today will be the family. The last 36 hours, I've
been thinking a lot about families in general (truthfully, more the
families of Salta than my own). Sunday
morning, after a firm commitment the night before, R C sent us
a text saying she wasn't coming to church because her "sister was right,
she doesn't fit in." That would be her younger sister T. Keep in
mind this is the C familiy, 6 daughters and a son living with their
single dad and aunt and uncle. Most of the family, apart from F
(dad) are at some lesser level of church activity, whether members or
not. They're all struggling to participate (wake up in time Sunday).
Long story short, there's just a lot of contention in the house. R
and T don't get along well, and there are just a lot of rifts. I
think kinda as a result, R spends time with 17 year old Franco (boss
hog, a bit lost). He supports R, albiet in making bad decisions
like smoking and drinking. R knows she shouldn't do that kind of
stuff, and wants to stop, but we saw Sunday morning a manifestation of this rift in her decisions.
We
went to try and convince her, but she wouldn't
budge. She cried a bit, and what I could make out in her tear-soaked
Spanish was that she thinks her family hates her, they don't support
her, and that shes forgiven them one too many times. I just felt sad.
She wouldn't get up and come to church simply because her sister was
there.
I decided to look for a Gen Conf. talk in my pile of
Spanish Conference editions. I read a talk by Elder Bednar in' 09 - "More
Diligent and Concerned at Home." His take-aways are that the little
things done consistently, like express and show love, and bear testimony
of simple truths, are the keys to a more loving home. I'd encourage ALL
to read it.
Anyway,
then I read a letter this morning from pop. He
said simply at the end that he's kinda jealous of the gang, because they
got to spend sooo much time with me, while the family sincerely just
kinda took a backseat. He said he wasn't trying to make me feel bad, and
that we can't change the past. Whatever. I love my family. So much. I
miss you guys, and I sometimes think about how sweet it'll be to do the
little things, the things I took for granted. Going to Maine and putting
away the cell phones and computers, reading the scriptures together,
Family Night, going out to eat. I miss more than anything the time.
Hahahah I was so stupid. I laughed at the expression "forced family fun"
because I didn't understand the importance of the family. I regret not
spending so much time at home, and I will for sure make up for it going
forward.
I can't describe very well my feelings, but I'll
try. I've seen a lot of families in my life and in my mission. I've seen
the ways parents discipline and even just talk to their children. I
also recognize that every single family I know, including ESPECIALLY my
own, has their problems. What I've observed is that when love prevails,
unconditional, unquestioning (albeit perhaps deeply rooted and not
waving on a flagpole in the yard) makes all the difference in the
emotional/spiritual well-being, and general happiness in a person. There
is no substitute. Love your brothers, love your mothers, love your
fathers, love your sisters. It's the best way.
We'll see how it goes with the C family. They're
definitely my little family here in Salta. Regardless, I know that God
loves us all and he's given us our families as a supreme gift, as well
as test. They can and will be the source of the ultimate happiness.
As for the rest of the week, things are going
alright. We taught a ton of lessons this week (getting after it), but
the spiritual progression hits plateaus or brick walls. I've got one last
week in this forsaken land full of challenges, and I'm gonna make the
best of it. I strive to not think selfishly about the timing of
baptisms. In my experience, this mission focuses a lot on numbers, like
who is baptizing and how often. While motivated in some way for the
eternal well-being of souls, I don't see x number of baptisms from Elder
Blake as a very good indicator of success. A is ready to be
baptized any day now, but she lacks a strong desire because she still
isn't 100% sure the church is true etc. I say "Hey, I wasn't 100% sure
until I became a missionary. I'd lie if I said I am 100% right now. With
such surety, it's impossible to have faith. I believe with all my
being, but you sure don't have to KNOW to show your faith in the waters
of baptism." My conclusion: I'd love to be a part of her baptism, but
I'll respect the Lord's timing. She has repented of a lot of things, and
has really turned her life around. Pressuring her out of my own
personal ambition is foolish. I'll do all I can to help her take the
step, but it will be out of a desire to help her and
to please God.
Love, Elder Blake
 | |
| Bonus pic - from Elder Hermanson's mom :) |
No comments:
Post a Comment